Bags Packed??

So here’s the deal…

The older you get the more chance there is of meeting someone who is divorced, has kids or both!

Over the past few years and changes in society, there are many things that are no longer as “pure” as you’d wish it to be. At the end of the day everything you do in life has some sort of compromise boundary and that’s what sets apart bastards & bitches to those who are preparing to give people a fair chance.

So, you meet someone or you’ve known someone for years. there is an attraction but he/she (hereon referring to male references) was married at the time. a few years later he gets divorced and a few months later he is now into you. What do you do? yes, in this case we’ll assume that you are into him as well. You, as the receiving partner, is prepared to enter into a new relationship, fresh and “free” of baggage. But the questions that goes through our minds always seem to be the questions that leaves you questionably fulfilled or entirely unfulfilled. is he ready for another relationship? What if I’m just a rebound? What if marriage is rekindled with ex wife? what will PEOPLE say? Am i just the easiest option? is he being the opportunist and just trying his luck (after all, he is divorced right) What is he never wants to get married again? What if he doesn’t get over his ex? where does this leave me? is this a good idea after all? at this point, i cannot speak on behalf of a guy experiencing this but i can speak for a female. and the one thing i can say to this is yes! we do think of all this questions, all the time. is not a case of reading into things, its a case of protecting ourselves before things get outa hand.

So what would your inevitable conclusion to this matter be should you find yourself in a situation like this? Personally i haven’t been in this situation but i can say that speaking off the top of my head the first step would be time. Irrespective of the reasons as to why is marriage ended, he will need time to heal, time to open up and most importantly time to trust again. so if you in a good space where he is already speaking to you, good! keep it going. Do not shut down the idea of him speaking bout his ex. if anything, in my opinion, it is showing that he is playing open cards with you. Of course, within the first few months, i wouldn’t expect him to open up completely so the chance of you knowing if this is an initial rebound is slim to none. My rule of thumb is “if you remove all insecurities, fears and general concerns of what other people would say” what does your gut tell you? that to me is pretty much a safe answer to go with. yes, yes of course you will also consider factors such as how long you know him, his personality as a whole and associated factors. Overall, I'm not saying accommodate him in every way possible, I'm saying have fun. as long as you can still enjoy each other’s company with him having this already packed his bags, then why not continue? And most importantly, don't give a shit as to what there people think! In fact, “other people” have no bearing on whatever relationship you choosing to start and will have no bearing in the decisions you make in the end as well. I just believe a relationship is meant for 2 people, the more you convert it into an orgy, the more people enjoy or the higher your chances of being screwed in the bum! so do what makes you happy. no one else. Ok, I'm done with this chapter now. LOL

Let’s talk about kids and new people. In this session, i will talk only from a chick’s perspective dealing with a man who has a kid/kids. To any man who had his kid out of love or “accident” with his current GF and assuming that his relationship has now gone to shit for whatever reason. To any man that i have ever spoken to, it is one helluva adjustment having a kid and even more of an adjustment having to get around the idea of him having a new gf (not casual). You meet him. you become friends. he tells you he has a kid. He tells you that he is still actively involved in his kids life. you start something with him (all in the name of fun). fun becomes more fun becomes feelings becomes questionable. So she starts to trip and ask herself what if he doesn’t any more kids cos she wants kids one day? what if the decision to wanting kids vs. not wanting kids is the difference between this “thing” going no where slowly? what if he makes a decision but the mommy cannot accept the fact that he now has someone else? what if the mommy becomes such a bitch and stops him from seeing his child as a result of you!? This, in my opinion, is potentially more messed up that divorce for the simple reason that other people are involved in your relationship but default!

Agreed that for anyone, these are 2 of the most difficult scenario’s to find yourself in and definitely something that we either choose to deal with (or not) before we even meet someone. It's also an issue that, us as humans are for the most part, prepared to take on as we have that “forgiving” spirit in us and can reason to the fact that his/her past is just that. The past.

So, in closing, to those dealing with this or to those who have dealt with this or to those who are currently in this. How have you handled the bags that has been packed? have you grown a skew spine cos of this weight or have your shoulders become broad enough to stand tall and be proud? what are the issues that you have also faced, that perhaps i have overlooked in this post?

Peace

Cansa

Cancer, as common as the flu a friend quoted. We all know someone affected by Cancer and most likely got eaten alive by it. Personally, I've lost an Uncle (Godfather) to Colon Cancer 4 years ago. A great man, husband, father, brother and friend. Its heart-breaking and frustrating to see a loved one deteriorate what feels like in seconds. I remember that day clearly because the key broke off in the door that very evening I was in the toilet.
I once read somewhere that one way of looking at a terminal disease is that you have the opportunity to say your goodbyes and tell them how much you love them whereas you can lose a loved one in an instant in a car crash. There's no easy way of looking at it. This is all parts of Gods plan.
In his plan, I believe, he sent us an Angel in return. My nephew Mason, born on my late uncles birthday last October. Life is beautiful, it's how you choose to look at it.

In memory of my uncle, the family signed up for the Cansa Relay for Life. An overnight 12 hour relay event, Why? Cause Cancer never sleeps. Teams of 10-15 people participate in the relay by walking along the track throughout the duration of the 12 hour event with at least 1 member walking on the track at all times. The event was held at Vygieskraal Stadium in Athlone on Friday 23rd March 2012. It was overwhelming setting foot in the stadium, to see all those affected by Cancer and all the families who came to support. I was even more overwhelmed to see the amount of survivors dressed in blue t-shirts adorned with a sash with the words survivor inscribed on it and those in pink tees whom are in remission. Each family had their tent pitched up on the field, some made banners, had tees printed of their loved ones and paper lanterns adorned with messages and pictures which were later used for the Luminaria Ceremony. The paper lanterns lined the track and were left burning throughout the night to remind participants of the incredible importance of their contributions.

Entertainment was plentiful. Cheering the crowd on in true Cape style were some talented singers, klopse band, dancers and Limited Edition Drummers (semi-finalists in SA Got Talent). Guest speaker and cancer survivor Patricia De Lille was present too. It was great to see so many youngsters and local schools in the area give up their Friday night to come support and cheer the crowd on.

The Relay for Life opened with the Cancer survivors taking on the first lap, I could barely contain my tears. As overwhelming as it was I was even more psyched up to start walking. Team MO was on track along with all the other families, the atmosphere buzzing, 10, 9....3, 2 ,1 and off we went. I must add that I'm a fast walker, I have long legs and walking behind a slow crowd frustrated me a little, soon I wondered through the crowd away from my team members to set a comfortable pace for myself. As I was walking along one t-shirt caught my eye. A family member or friend of the late Dane Johnson. I thought to myself I met you Dane Johnson, I was so shocked, a friendly guy I got to know briefly and haven't heard from in years is now gone at the age of 24. R.I.P Dane.

I stayed on track for a consecutive 2 hours with a family member joining me at every alternate lap till my cramps got a little too much. I didn't get to stay the entire event but next year I'm there in full force, family and all.

Life is short, Cancer can be beaten. Don't ignore that ache and pain because its bearable. Its your body telling you somethings wrong. I had a 2nd lump removed from my breast 2 weeks ago. I discovered it months ago but the procrastinator in me just continued as normal until it started causing pain throughout my boob and armpit. I got my results of the operation last Friday to discover it was a tumor called Phyllodes tumor. Benign thank God.

In memory of those we lost, in remission, survivors and those fighting Cancer.

Love and Miss you Uncle Michael ♥

GlossyBox in March

Glossybox is here!!!!!

The thrill once I receive an sms from Glossybox saying my box has left their warehouse, is as good as that of the first kiss with someone new (yeah I love to exaggerate). I get excited like that, makes me wanna air hump all the beautiful things I lay my eyes on. Anyway...

I love that my Glossybox tends to my current needs. This months box included a luxury face cream (that I would never in a million years be able to afford), a rich moisturizing heel balm (in dying need of that), hand sanatizer ( I hate sticky dirty fingers), face masks (my weekend spa treat) and 2 extra makeup treats (can never have too much of) just because.

Products:

• Anesi Beaute Stem C3 Emulsion - This smooth, smells like toffee apple, serum is divine. Packed with  Apple Stem Cells and Vitamin C said to reverse chronological ageing and delay deterioration of essential skin cells (aka reverting my skin back to its virgin state). It can be used as a day and/or night cream. I personally prefer using it as a night cream because I believe I get the full effect of the product this way. Smacked onto a clean dry face and absorbed during my much needed beauty sleep. A little goes a long way. My skin definitely looked more healthier and luminous.
• Creative Nail Design Scentations - Cucumber Heel balm - I love the fresh cucumber scent. Richly moisturizing to hydrate and repair dry,cracked skin. The results of this is amazingly noticeable immediately. Lord knows how badly I needed this, I wore slip slops the entire summer. And again I prefer applying this at night.
• So Pure Hand Sanatizer - This germ killer zaps in one squirt, aids in eliminating viruses, bacteria, fungi, yeast and mould. Also effective against Tuberculosis, Staphylococcus, Candida albicans, Listeria, E.coli, Pseudomonas aeruginos, Hepatitis A, Polio and Herpes virus. Makes you feel as safe and clean as your mothers womb.
• Dr Hauschka Rejuvenating and Firming Mask - This gets applied to your face, earlobes, neck and upper chest on clean skin. What I love about this product is its not your typical mask that dries tight on your skin. It smoothes on gently and after 20min you gently compress it away with a moist lukewarm cloth. Result, refreshingly moisturized skin.
• Beaute Charcoal Eye Pencil - Charcoal
• Urban Chic Charcoal Eyeshadow - Charcoal

x2 of each 

Above is the Urban Chic Charcoal Eyeshadow
Below is the Beaute Charcoal Eye pencil

Confession!

I'm no fan of cheap makeup brands (eg. those packaged for local stores) however the payoff from the Beaute eye pencil is amazing. Its highly pigmented and stays put once applied as I have oily eyelids.


Get Glossyfied

Top 15 Youtube Videos

This was tough enough cutting it down to just 15 of my all time favorite YouTube clips. It was impossible for me to put them from best to bestest order. They've brought joy to my life and I feel it's my duty to share them with you.
So here in no particular order... Enjoy!

You’re so skinny!

So the age old topic of weight amongst females which has been discussed over and over and over so much so that people are getting fat and becoming famous for losing all the weight they initially gained.

Being a true believer of having a “just-be-you” attitude, I have to admit that I have not seen much, If any, articles on the other side of this fat vs, thin debate!

So let’s be serious ladies…

80% of women are complaining about how fat the are and how they need to lose weight and, and, and…

10% of women are completely happy with their weight only because they are on the strictest diets and have gym programmes on lockdown!

But no one ever gave thought to the other  10% who are on the side of the spectrum.

“you are so skinny. Look at how thin your arms are (grabbing your wrists), how do you stay so thin”

Im sure I can speak for the minority of us who sometimes don’t like being this skinny. We don’t live in Europe or US where the skinnier women is portrayed as beautiful. We live in SA where the full figured, voluptuous women are portrayed as that.

So guess what, we have the same thoughts as “fat chicks” do, only that its less apparent due because of what the media tells us to believe.

I bet if I were to say “oh you so fat” or “you look so much fatter since I last saw you”, I would get bitch slapped to the next planet.

So lemme ask this question…

Why is it then acceptable to have such a level of double standards in this country (and world)?

Just because the bigger women can assume that its acceptable to be thinner, under no circumstances means that the skinny chick is ok with hearing how skinny she is. Perhaps she wants to be fat as much as you would like to be thin.

That’s the demons all females possess right? We wana be someone we are not instead of being happy with what we have.

Of course I am passionate about this topic and we could go on and on about this but let me end by saying… Let’s embrace the curves and (non-existant curves) which all of us do possess and be happy and supportive to each other.

The biggest issues amongst us is that we compete against each other trying to be on top. But if everyone saw that we are all “competing” for the same thing…. Acknowledgment.  We could all then get where we want to be faster, happier and richer (cos we wont be spending all this money trying to change ourselves) 

Ourselves

So once again another one of the many things women stress about are ourselves!
We constantly speaking these negative thoughts in our heads… she is so pretty, she is gorgeous! Why cant I look like that? She is so skinny? She has such nice hair! And on and on and on.
But seriously now, if you look at the women you have been comparing yourself to, you’ll see that it is all cosmetic/material and the positivity they exude when they walking through that shopping mall. And in our heads we all have the same excuses aswell…. “I don’t have the money to look like that, I don’t have the time, I actually have a job, kids to look after, shit to do, and whatever, whatever”
If you ever had a gym contract and actually went to gym… have you ever wondered why most of the people in gym are men??? When women are the ones complaining about how fat they are? And also, why the little women that are in gym are the well toned “skinny” ones? C’mon now??? And yes, I am one of the culprits, but we are really the only ones to blame when it comes to ourselves and the image we portray to other people. Are you ladies kidding me! If you are unhappy and think you fat, then change it.
Secondly, there has never been a single woman that Ive met who hasn’t said something bad about her hairstyle! But once again, who are the ones In the salon… the women with the perfect hair that we stare at all the time! So what if you cant afford a salon treatment once a week, I bet that everyone of you out there owns a hairdryer, flat iron or something like that. I should’ve invented the hairdryer, I would’ve been freaking rich by now!!! So ladies… there are home kits of every kind these days. Since everything you do is about trial and error, if you don’t like something, change it! buy some hair dye, (if you really broke and trust your friend) ask her to give you a hair cut, she’ll be too willing, then finish it off with that hair dryer of yours!
All women think that we need money to look good or we need that man to pay for our “make-overs”! I believe in doing shit on your own. Its rewarding at the end of the day and wont be kept against you in the event of a break-up!
We believe that we need to have loads of money to buy all those clothing to look so good. You don’t need much if you have access to the internet (websites which tell you which clothing suits which body types) and Mr. Price in your neighbourhood! We believe that without a stylist, a personal trainer and a chef, we can never look like that. But what are the chances that majority of us will be able to afford those luxuries given the “normal” life you live.
We are all so afraid of change in our lives but we really have nothing to lose if you think about how bad you are feeling about yourself as it is. So why not try it! see how that works for you! As a female, you weren’t born “normal”. You were never designed to fit in with the rest of us out there. You were designed to leave your mark on other people. To be remembered as one females who inspired to be and do everything she could. Irrespective of your circumstances, background, how much money you have and, and, and!!

Short and sweet... LOL
Let's all use this advice.

The Weather Man

There are many bad emotions to be felt by the human spirit. The one very high up on the list is the feeling of your best not being good enough.
Apart from heartbreak (which can be indirectly related to this) is the feeling that your best is not acknowledged as that but shut down like it was the worst decision one could ever have made.
As the weather man constantly predicts inaccurate weather forecasts for the days ahead. We, nevertheless, watch and prepare for what he has told us knowing that it would most likely not be that way…
In the very same way we start and end each day, What is our way of preparing ourselves for the “events” that lie ahead of us? Do we trust the source even though it may be inaccurate? Why do we rely on the falsified assurance that what we are doing is what we are meant to be doing?
I mean, fuck, if you were to prepare me for downfalls after I had tried my best, I can damn well guarantee you that I wouldn’t try as hard as I do to begin with. But we don’t have that security so we carry on…
There’s a bit of a saying that goes: “those who don’t give a fuck, lives happiest” and in contradiction to that: “to those who don’t give a fuck, is not cared for by others” So either way you screwed.
To everyone this either has applied to you or can apply to you now. You might feel it in the workplace. You might feel it in your relationships. You might feel it in the smallest things. Whether in a small or a big way, you are affected by it. And it pretty much seems to have a ripple effect on other facets of your life. How do you control it? How do you remove yourself from a situation that you haven’t really given up on. How do you fix the “wrongs” when you can give no better than you have been giving (which is your best)? To even comprehend a concept like that right now is beyond me. Yet, we push on.
For me… when I'm made to feel like this, I do one of 2 things: 1. Go back to thinking how I was before I actually made the decision to consciously do better. 2. How would things be if I just stopped trying. Of course those thoughts gets me nowhere as it’s not in my nature to give up.
I need A weather man. THE weather man. MY weather man. Even though, his words wont be accurate, at least I'll know that I'm pushing in the right direction.
The universe will never give you more than you can't handle 
But at what point do the tests stop? Do they ever stop?
I need my weather man…

♪♫ My body is a movie and your Penis is the STAR ♪♫

So to every women out there, we have all had penis experiences and many men asking us how we rated to our previous experiences.
Well the truth is, with anything in life, you get nice ones and not so nice ones. It can be compared to ice-cream!
You get Rum-and-Raisin (and no the raisins doesnt represent disease in this analogy!) rum-and-raisin being the old, everyone’s tasted, and its not so lekker anymore kinda ones. Because chicks have hearts, we often do not explain the extreme severity of their downfall to a man but for the most part we’ll avoid it. Period.
But of course there’s the other side of the spectrum. The delicious piece of man meat known as the Hagen Daas of this world. The ones that makes you wana cut it off and keep it in a jar right on your pedestal! The one we cannot keep out hands, mouth and any other part off it.
But the real question is not the bad and good ones. The real question is how you tell your man that you’ve had better. In the very same way, he has probably had better, you’ve had better. So WHEN he asked, what did you say?
Im pretty much honest in my approach to everything and so I’ve given credit where credit was due! Infact, I have already told a guy that I would like to cut his Penis off and frame it, cos its just so beautiful to look at!!! To the nice ones… I fell asleep with it in my hand, I've coiled on it, complimented it and sure as hell have given it the royal treatment!
So ladies, how would you rate your man? rum-and-raisin, vanilla/choc twirl (normal) or Haagen Daas? and for those of you who are inlove, dont let love place a biased opinion on this matter!

The Penis song. Enjoy =)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0tWfosqBsOY

Fashion Party @ 169

With any type of launch comes stress, I like to challenge my stress to be even more awesome. Not to stroke my big bow in red I think we did a pretty banging job. Hours before the event one of our models went AWOL and already being short 2 models myself and Nic morphed into Model Model. Which painfully meant I had to wear mega high heels (I don't do heels at all, okay maybe for role playing). If anyone noticed my knees jiggle it's because I was concentrating so hard not to fall but instead knocked my head into the trees the entire night in the club. Enough about me.

The setup was glamorous, candlelit VIP area, champers to toast and the most delicious cupcakes I've ever had. Ferial of FCM really outdone herself with this lavish event and the leopard print goodie bags. Thanks again for the opportunity, we met some fantastic contacts and the orders are rolling in :)

Other featured designers House of Phi looked amazing in there elegant dreamy designs, made me feel like I need to be on holiday rocking their label.

We got to meet the gorgeous Taryn-Lee Olifant (winner of Die Son) kitted out in FCM and the multi-talented Blogger Tamika Doubell too.

Unfortunately we didnt get to see NKE perform.

Excuse the crappy pics but thanks Reece nonetheless, need to get my paws on a better camera, soon.

Thanks Contour Events and Designs for our banner.

A Fabulous event enjoyed by all.

To order email redbow25@gmail.com

Rocking Redbow

Nic and our 2 models Bianca and Carmen

Nic with House of Phi models

Nic with Tamika (left of Nic) with FCM models

Ferial and one of her designs

RedBow enjoying the afterparty

Nic and Reece

Banner by Contour Events & Designs

♪ If you don't know, now you know Nigga ♫

The older I get the longer I take to recover from a hangover and more so stopped me from midweek partying but Classics is an exception. I'm quite hungover as I'm typing this, hence the short blog post. And thanks to my cool boss he don't bother me the first Friday of every month, i reserve this day strictly for the Classics aftermath.

HAPPY 3rd BIRTHDAY CLASSICS!

♪♫ This is how we do it♪♫

Here's a little taste of what goes down at Classics

http://www.mixcrate.com/mix/125164/DJ-Azuhl--Classic-Material-Vol-2